Meet my report card demon.
His name is ‘donotwanttothinkaboutit’. It means ‘bad thing’ in some obscure hidden mountain dialect that was passed down to me by my mother.
On Thursday, December 16TH I, a home learning mom, woke up with the piercing knowledge of what that day is. I pulled and dragged myself out of the safety of my blankets and tiptoed out of my room. Out. A very unfriendly word to me that day because I knew that there will me another ‘out’. An ‘out’ that will actually be ‘out’ in the elements. In the world. To be seen. To hear. To see. To hear. And most frightfully….to read.
I took my time waking the kids because I had to collect myself. My fear of ‘donotwantotthinkaboutit’ is here. My heart was beating so hard in it’s presence that I think it could have burst out of me and punched him in his intrusive and reality reflecting eyes. I had mentioned before I was anxious for today. I had a ton of questions. Although ‘donotwanttohearaboutit’ has got a large gaping mouth – apparently it’s only good for scaring the poop out of me. No answers were given by him. No comforting words. Just the lingering anxiety of finding out how my children did this first full term of home learning.
When they woke and got ready for the day ahead, I paid special attention not to mention what Thursday was. Until my 4th coffee…
“REPORT CARD DAY!” crashed through a ‘normal’ school day morning.
They looked up at me briefly then resumed doing whatever the heck they were doing. I had too much of a coffee buzz to notice.
We all somehow got successfully dressed in our jackets and boots for my ‘out’ and went to school.
Every step sent lightning through me. I was so anxious that at one point I looked behind me and saw my children a half a block behind. Great, adding guilt to my anxiety. I stopped and waited for them and when they cought up we resumed marching toward my nightmare.
We got there! Alive and intact! With the feeling of that accomplishment I reached into their file and saw the brown enveloped. I pulled them out and sent my children to class. I decided to to show the kids their report cards there. I really didn’t want to have a full out brake down in front of the teacher added to my morning.
When I got home I opened the first envelope. Feeling ‘donotwanttothinkaboutit’ with me, I looked at the grades. OMG! My grade 5er did awesome! With the renovation going on in the house he became a B student! I rushed over to his file, pulled out the report cards from the years when he was at normal/regular/public school. Folks, he jumped up 2 grades levels! Also, what the teacher said about him in the comments was nothing but the most wonderful things about him. I am happy. I am ecstatic.
‘donotwanttothinkaboutit’ exploded with the impact of my cheers!
Now the second one. My grade 2er does not get grades yet, not until grade 3 I think, but the comments are awesome! She is doing very well as well!
I jumped around the house for a while. Called my husband at work a few times. Called a few other people at their work as well. Then went picked up the kids nearly skipping the whole time.
Later that night, we showed the kids their report cards. They were happy but with the same nonchalant attitude as this morning. I guess they knew they were doing well. ‘donotwanttothinkaboutit’ did not bother them at all. Next report card day, I think I will look at them for comfort. I would save a lot of coffee if I do.
I am very proud!